YES MICHIGAN! THE FEELING'S FOREVER....

This morning we woke up to another day of whirling snowflakes.  We are expecting 2 to 4 inches.  It's so beautiful! 

As I walked from my car into the office, I ran into two different people that complained about the snow.  I smiled and nodded with empathy.  I've tried to hate on Michigan winter. I'm sometimes tempted to join the majority that bitch nonstop about our Midwest cold and snow to, you know, fit in. They generally start as the first autumn leaf floats to the ground and build to a crescendo during February and March. The remnants of this cold weather bitch fest go on into late spring when the temps finally become stable. 

The thing is, I love winter. Just like I love spring, fall and even summer. I like the variation and stark difference of each season. I wouldn't like living in a place where all the seasons were the same, the type of clothing didn't change and the food was mostly summer salads and barbecue. Boring…..

I love sweaters and sweatshirts, scarves and mittens. I mean, barbecue is nice. But so are soup and chili, stews and hot cocoa. I love a brisk bundled up walk on a snowy winter’s day followed by that steaming cup of hot cocoa with marshmallows on top. Or, sitting by an out of doors fire with friends sipping warm mulled wine (I've never actually had warm mulled wine, but I'll bet it's awesome).

I’m all for making the best of it. Kind of like I do when it’s 95 degrees with a heat index of 110 (To be fair, I have air conditioning).  My point is, there is something beautiful everywhere for those with the eyes to see.

I wrote this a few years back. I’m feeling it today.

THE ZEN OF WINTER

"ZEN - enlightenment that is attained through meditation, self-contemplation, and intuition."

I marvel over the quiet beauty that is the season of winter, my muse.

Dignified, regal, elegant in its simplicity, winter is the soul of reflection. It is the contemplative season, ceasing outward activity for tranquil introspection, keeping sweet secrets that will surface in the spring in a vibrant rush of new life.

Winter is the guru of cyclical nature, leading us to slow down, reflect and savor the warmth of hearth and home, family and friends and to forge a mental path for the days to come when time will be stolen by other outdoor activities. Relish the solitude, the chance for brief intervals of hibernation; to recharge and become enlightened.

The Zen of Winter

ALMOST CUT MY HAIR

There’s this thing I do.  I do it when I’m stressed or when I feel crappy about myself.  Sometimes I do it when life seems unmanageable.  I used to do it when I had PMS.  I don’t do it every day – I’d be bald.  But it happens.  It’s almost always a symptom of something out of kilter in my universe.  

I cut my hair. What I know about cutting hair you could stick in your eye.  I can say with certainty that scissors are involved. 

I started snipping my hair as a teenager.  I was in the early stages of flying my freak flag and gave my crowning glory a Rod Stewart shag (his Small Faces – pre lounge lizard days), short and spiked on the top and long on the sides and bottom - an abstract not quite mullet, done entirely  by yours truly.  Awesome!  But not.  I have curly hair which, at that time, was the bane of my 16 year old existence, and I had no blow dryer in those days.  So I bought a product called Dippety Do to smear on the spikes, then pinned them down until they dried so they would stand up all nice and straight and spiky as opposed to the poodle look that ensued without it.

I don’t have any pictures of that style, THANK GOD!  Because I remember it and although to my demented teenage mind it looked pretty cool, I’m sure adults looking at it felt much like I do these days when seeing young dudes with their pants hanging down past their crotch displaying their boxers and walking like there’s a stick up their ass.  

For sure, I know my mom hated it….she didn’t hesitate to let me know.  But no mind... she hated other cool stuff too, like my bell bottom hip hugger jeans that were intentionally so long they dragged on the ground becoming  ripped, dirty and frayed along the bottom (that's what made them cool).  Or, the seal skin coat I purchased at a thrift shop that had bald patches all over it.  These were, in my eyes, the bomb!

Control

When you’re a teenager, and starting to find out who you are, everything revolves around controlling your image – even if you don’t know what that image is yet.  And it’s hard to do because you’re kind of dumb and naïve and in most cases, the best you can hope for is to navigate the shark tank and keep your legs.  Because it is truly a jungle out there for that age group. 

The truth is that while I cut my hair as a teenager for reasons that are very different from why I do so today, the common denominator is the same.  It’s all about control.  Today, the image and angst of my teen years is replaced with feelings about my self-image and self-worth.  It’s about disappointment and the presentiment that time and opportunity are somehow slipping through my fingers and I can’t grasp them.  So, I feel helpless and out of control.  I look in the mirror and I don’t like what I see in that moment so I grab the scissors and snip a little here and a little there.  And for a few minutes I feel that some little part of my life is being steered by me, again – for better or worse.  

I hadn't done any impulsive hair cutting in quite some time - a few years actually.  But in the last few months I've gone through a rough patch and lopped off actual inches - a few times.  Thankfully, curly hair has turned out to be my friend.  Turns out that it can cover a multitude of hair cutting sins.

I understand that control is mostly an illusion and that how we respond to challenges and obstacles in our days make all the difference in our outlook. This is something I know from years of experience.  Yet now and then, in weak moments,I let go of letting go, instead reacting in ways that bring no benefit and sometimes, even more chaos.  Fortunately, it's only hair.  Mine grows fast. 

I recently read on Zenhabits, a blog that I like, “When we are in the midst of chaos, let go of the need to control it. Be awash in it, experience it in that moment, try not to control the outcome but deal with the flow as it comes.”  ~Leo Babuta.  That makes sense to me.